Dexter Fic: Breakable Girls and Boys

[intrikate88]

Title: Breakable Girls and Boys

Author:

intrikate88

 

Rating: PG-13 (slight language)

Fandom: Dexter

Spoilers: 2x02 “Waiting to Exhale”. Takes place sometime soon after ep.

Summary: Control and brokenness. Deb and Dexter aren’t that different.

 

Deb runs, pushing her feet and clinging to the rhythm of the elliptical as her fingers spread across the metal bars she grips. She’s going to be in the best shape of her life (revenge for Rudy trying to take that life away) and she keeps her breathing steady, her heart rate lower almost every workout (maybe one day not even the sight of duct tape will send her pulse rocketing.)

 

The display registers her pulse going back up rapidly after thoughts of Rudy intrude. She nearly hits the screen in frustration.

 

Fuck, she thinks, wish I could be like Dexter, he’s always calm. Don’t know why he puts up with a monster like me invading his space.

 

But she can’t feel how she wants to feel, so she forces her heart back into a place she can control, so everyone will think she’s okay, and not a broken little girl.

 

*  *  *

 

Dexter methodically winds the last of the plastic wrap around his victim before tying it off. He looks around, making sure his tools and knives are laid out in order, that the photos are displayed in the most visible places. This is his domain: everything precisely the way he planned it.

 

He doesn’t hate this. He doesn’t love this. It is a hunger that needs feeding. Sometimes he experiments with trying to feel guilt or elation, but they don’t stick.

 

As he powers up his reciprocating saw, he thinks, Wish I was more like Deb. She feels the appropriate reactions. It helps that she doesn’t know she’s living with a monster. Again.

 

But for all his wishing he still feels nothing but an inappropriate need for satisfaction. He cuts through skin and bone, manipulating the limbs; now the sociopath will settle down, now he can pretend, and everyone will think he’s okay, and not a broken little boy.

Comments

[outsideth3box.livejournal.com]

Jeezus.

That was gorgeous.

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

Aw! Thank you so much!

[thunderemerald.livejournal.com]

Ooh, thanks for linking back to this again! I saw it on the comm when it was first written, and you know, meant to read it but didn't. But I did, and I've managed to stop staring at your mood icon long enough to reply.

In short, I like this a lot. Just a little snapshot into two people's obsessive behavior, the things they do to try and appear normal. And I love so much that they each want to be more like the other. Well done!

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

Thank you for reading this! I'm glad you liked it. XD

[thunderemerald.livejournal.com]

But of course! ....moreplease? :)

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

Um... duh. :P I've got something brewing on the brain now, but it hasn't started bubbling yet. We'll see!

[thunderemerald.livejournal.com]

What kind of something? *pokes*

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

I don't know yet! *pokes brain* Something to do with the distance and inability to connect all the characters seem to experience. Lots of dramatic irony- like Angel telling Dexter about how he just doesn't understand his wife's feelings and why she wants a divorce, while Dexter is sitting there not paying attention and thinking how nobody is anything like him. That's where my brain is, musing about these contrasts of community/solitude and connection/lack of connection, and of course the ever-popular appearance/reality. I want to watch the show again and see what else I get out of it.

[thunderemerald.livejournal.com]

Those are great themes to explore, and ooh I hope something happens! I have this problem where themes always pop into my head, but I don't know how to turn them into STORIES. Vignettes, maybe, but as much as I like reading vignettes, I don't like writing them. They leave me feeling like I've taken a bit of the character's brain and put it on a slide, but nothing has HAPPENED. Ergh, does that make any sense at all?

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

Ideas on a slide? How strangely appropriate! :P

[thunderemerald.livejournal.com]

D'oh. Didn't even mean it that way! Silly me.

[krumnut.livejournal.com]

wow, that is so well put.

I love Deb and Dexter, they just have this dynamic that works so well together, they are my favorites on the show, we need more fanfiction with Dex and Deb.

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! I'm glad this worked for you. And yes, we really do need more fic with Dex and Deb... or even just fic in general.

[ninamazing.livejournal.com]

OMG I LOVE DEXTER AND DEB AND YOU. ♥ Perfection!

He doesn’t hate this. He doesn’t love this. It is a hunger that needs feeding.

I am so into this bit.

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

So glad you liked!